Sweeney Todd the parody
by Ratty Bjorn
Summary: A Sweeney Todd parody chatroom style! Scary, no?


Author's Note: Hi. This is sort of my second fanfiction; I collaborated with Fantisma to make another Sweeney Todd humor story. It's like Sweeney Todd - chatroom style. And it's a parody too. It's funny in a very random way, I guess. You have to know the plot pretty well to get all the jokes. Enjoy!

P.S. By the way, the misspellings and stuff are intentional. I'm making fun of the spelling in chatrooms. If you can't tell.

P.P.S. No, I do not own Sweeney Todd! GAWSH! (Ha. The Capslock of Rage and Death had been used. Muahahaha.)

P.P.P.S. I just put this postscript in to get on reader's nerves. Sorry. On to the actual thing, now.

* * *

tobytobytoby: pay attention y'all 

randompersonofnoparticularimportance: sweeney kills ppl!!!1!11

barberman2: hi

randompersonofnoparticularimportance: wow

* * *

judget: hi lucy 

happylucy7: go away

bbarker: yeah

judget (admin): bbarker has broken forum rule.

bbarker: hey that's not fair

(bbarker has been banned from chatroom)

judget (admin): all ur lucy are belong to us

happylucy7:-(

cutelittlejohanna: goo?

judget: um…

* * *

15 years later 

(goodsailordude had invited barberman2 into the chatroom)

goodsailordude: hi

barberman2: thx

goodsailordude: no prob. who r u?

barberman2: sweeney todd.

goodsailordude: why r u here?

barberman2: um long story

goodsailordude???

crazybeggarwmn: MUNY MUNY MUNY?

goodsailordude: um here

crazybeggarwmn: don't I know u

barberman2: go away

goodsailordude: no worries bout her man

barberman2: i hate this place :-(

goodsailordude: rly? i luv it. why?

barberman2: u will see later. g2g

goodsailordude: bye then.

* * *

barberman2: hello…? 

fancylovett: OMG!!!!!!!11

barberman2: sry!

fancylovett: oh no no no it's ok. u want a pie?

barberman2: ok…

fancylovett: srsly?

barberman2: k

fancylovett: im worried

barberman2: yuck

fancylovett: yeah theyre bad cuz im poor

barberman2: then rent out that room

fancylovett: nah, this guy used to live there an then judget (teh admin d00d) kicked him off and then his wife got… well… it wasn't good and judget got the kid

barberman2:-O

fancylovett: hi bbarker!

barberman2: shut up

fancylovett: ;-) look i got ur razors!

barberman2: OOOOOMMMMMGGGGGGG! 3 3 3 so shiney

barberman2: my friends

fancylovett: im ur friend u can live here now

barberman2: MY ARM IS COMPLETE AGAIN!

fancylovett: k?

barberman2: um… k.

* * *

randompersonofnoparticularimportance: use those razors! 

chorusppls: YEAH!!!!!!!!! woohoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

cutelittlejohanna: birds! 

greenfinch31: chirp chirp chirpity chirp chirp

cutelittlejohanna: aw

linnetbirdie76: tweet

cutelittlejohanna: doncha wanna get outa there?

nighttinggale2: chirpy tweet chirp chirp tweety chirp

cutelittlejohanna: i wanna get out!

blackbird43: twitter chirrup.

cutelittlejohanna: teach me how 2 sing, cuz i ain't flyin nowhere

balckbird43: singin is what ur doin, toots

cutelittlejohanna: oh

goodsailordude: omg ur sooo pretty

cutelittlejohanna: hi :-)

goodsailordude: ;-)

judget: GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

goodsailordude: ok…

goodsailordude: ill be back!!!

goodsailordude: but u don't know it stupid judge

goodsailordude: lol

* * *

tobytobytoby: pay attention y'all 

chorusppls: why

tobytobytoby: cuz this gets rid of baldness!!!!!

chorusppls: ooooo

barberman2: no it doesn't

fancylovett: yeah

tobytboytoby: dang

pirelliveryitalian: I am-ah da bestest barbar der is!!!!!!!!!!!!

barberman2: no that's me

beadledeedledeedle: yup u r

pirelliveryitalian: dang

pirelliveryitalian: pst

barberman2: what

pirelliveryitalian: im really danny and all gimme al ur money

barberman2: omg blackmail and intrigue!!!1111

pirelliveryitalian: im irish and you couldn't tell!!!! lol

barberman2: die

pirelliveryitalian: akpth

tobytobytoby: where's pirelli?

barberman2: drinking will solve you problems. go away

tobytobytoby: k!

tobytobytoby: ma'am?

fancylovett: yes dahlin

tobytobytoby: mr t says drinking will solve my problems

fancylovett: alright then here's some gin

tobytobytoby: yay

* * *

judget (admin): im marrying my ward 

beadledeedledeedle: nice

judget (admin): she doesn't adore me tho :-(

beadledeedledeedle: shave and shell love u forever

judget (admin): kthnx!

* * *

cutelittlejohanna: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 

goodsailordude: what?!

cutelittlejohanna: A NOISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

goodsailordude: don't worry about that

cutelittlejohanna: ok

* * *

beadledeedledeedle: try todd 

judget (admin): todd?

beadledeedledeedle: sweeney todd

judget (admin): a sweeney todd?

beadledeedledeedle: sweeney todd

judget (admin): sweeney todd

* * *

That's all for now! More soon, though. Do tell me if you like it/hate it. 


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